


El Conductor

by Anonymous



Series: F1 Driver Character Studies [2]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Character Study, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-17 04:13:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21048101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: It is not easy being Checo Perez.





	El Conductor

Checo wanders out of his car and walks to the track. The world is spinning but he doesn’t know why; his short ass is too distracted by his gay thoughts to pay attention to where he’s going, and he walks straight into a wall.

"Vete a la mierda.”

He walks under the barrier to get into the paddock (without ducking) and heads towards the SportPesa Racing Point™ motorhome. He hits the glass door after missing the fact that it was glass and not, in fact, open air.

“Ow, my adorably freckled nose!”

Otmar looks at him with a wry smile.  
“Classic Checo. Always walking into shit, just like he walked into metaphorical shit in 2014 when he said Susie Wolff should go back to the kit-”

He’s silenced by a Pirelli tyre being thrown furiously across the room, hitting him square on the head. Miraculously, he’s fine, but he decides to shut up. Checo walks over to the bar and does sixteen tequila shots in a row to wake himself up.

He jumps into the cockpit before looking at the picture of John Paul II he keeps there to remind himself not to be gay. It’s not working, but he does it anyway. After doing several laps of the circuit he wanders back to his motorhome and goes to sleep.

When he wakes up, he stares at the ceiling and sighs to himself;

"Wow, the author really didn’t put any effort into this, did they?”

No they didn’t, Checo. No they didn’t.


End file.
